Avoid These Sex Drive Assassins!
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Forrest Gump may have believed that “life is like a box of chocolates,” but it can take more than that – or a dozen roses, even – to get your sex life back on track once it has been derailed by one of these sex drive monkey wrenches:
1. Partner Problems: Problems with your partner are among the top sex-drive killers. For women, feeling close is a major part of desire. For both sexes, watch for fallout from fights, poor communication, feeling betrayed, or other trust issues. These can lead to a loss of the closeness you once felt. If your sex life is idling, try spending more non-sexual time together, just the two of you. Find ways to express love without having sex. Getting closer can rebuild your sex drive.
2. Alcohol and Drug Use: A drink may make you feel more open to sex. But too much alcohol can numb your sex drive. Being drunk or high can also be a turn-off for your partner.
3. Stress: Some people thrive on stress, but sex doesn't. Stress at work, home, or in relationships can ripple adversely over into the bedroom. Learning how to handle it in a healthy way really helps.
4. Too Little Sleep: If you are not getting seven or more hours of sleep per night, don't expect your mojo to be fueled up. Do you have a sleep problem like trouble falling or staying asleep, or a condition such as sleep apnea? Fatigue saps sexy feelings. Work on your sleep habits, and if that doesn't help, talk to your doctor.
5. Having Kids: You don't lose your sex drive once you're a parent, but you do lose time from your day, in the midst if your world turning upside down. Think about hiring a babysitter to bring you and your partner some “alone time.”
6. Medication: Some drugs can turn down desire. They include some of these types of medications:
· Antidepressants
· Blood pressure medications
· Chemotherapy
· Anti-HIV drugs
· Finasteride
Switching drugs or dosages may help -- ask your doctor about that and never stop taking any medicine on your own. Tell your doctor, too, ifyour sex drive stalls soon after you start taking a new drug.
7. Depression: Being depressed can shut off pleasure in many things, including sex. That's one of many reasons to get help. If your treatment involves medication, tell your doctor if your sex drive is low, since some (but not all) depression drugs lower sex drive. Talk about it with your therapist, too.
8. Obesity: When you're overweight or obese, desire often dims. It could be that you don't enjoy sex, can't perform like you want to, or are held back by low self-esteem. Working on how you feel about yourself, with a counselor if needed, may make a big difference.
9. Poor Body Image: Feeling sexy is easier if you like how you look. Work on accepting your body as it is today, even if you're working to get in shape. Feeling good about yourself can put you in the mood. If your partner has low esteem, assure them that they're sexy.
10. Erection Problems: Men with erectile dysfunction often worry about how they will be able to perform sexually, and that worry can drain their desire. Erectile dysfunction can be treated, and couples can also work to keep it from affecting their relationship.
11. Low Testosterone: As men age, their testosterone levels may drop. This may lead to a dip in sexual desire.
Menopause: For many women, sex drive dims around menopause. This is due in part to symptoms such as vaginal dryness and pain during sex. But it is possible to have a great sex life after menopause by tending to your relationship, self esteem, and overall health.